Friday, August 24, 2007

Motorblog Burridge The Interview Part II: Jimmy asked me after we had finished our wee chat if there was a question I'd not been asked that I thought might have been? So I thought about it, and here it is:
Motorblog Misplaced Durex: That's how Lemmy used to introduce 'Lost Johnny,' and he did so on the 'Live '77' vinyl bootleg from Bolton Technical College which I no longer have a copy of, somehow. But my reason for blogging this one is our friend, Mick Farren, who wrote the lyrics for 'Lost Johnny,' is still worrying about the bees, or lack of them, on so maybe it's due to the smog in LA; because they're fine here outside my window on the purple Basil bush.

Monday, August 20, 2007

Motorblog Vinyl Junkies Paradise: My good buddy and local MHB, Eddie Evans, pointed out a great site for Motorhead vinyl - We haven't tried them, but they look to be OK.
(Heard from a couple of MHB's who recommend this company and say they are reliable and excellent to buy from).

Thursday, August 16, 2007

Motorblog Toothmarks In The Toilet Seat: Although TV's commercial breaks are by no means a favourite with me, it's good to be aware of what some of them are advertising. Like the two women who need their Activia, both feeling 'bloated' and 'un-feminine' until they've ingested this supposed mild yogurt-type laxative and enjoyed the results by having 'a good turn-out' and feeling awfully girlie once again.
But this evening there was a new one, with four women talking and giggling about a 'stool softener,' (nothing to do with furniture, I hasten to add!), as it seems to be called, and out of the two adverts, if you haven't been married almost 34 years like me and know every grunt and groan your partner makes, you may be shocked to find out, lads, that yes, even the ultra-feminine other half has a bit of trouble now and again getting out one of those Richard the III's which feels like it has barbed wire wrapped around it. And of course, the ads do it in such a delightfully feminine way, don't they, but I can't help having a giggle at what the results would be like if they did a lad's advert for the same thing.
Now, I don't have to say another word, do I, because I just know there are loads of you out there smiling right now who have worked in factories or wherever, and know exactly what lads, and this mythical advert, would be like, so I'll just leave you with those thoughts to chuckle over...
Motorblog Motorhead Audiobiography: Just had one of those 'nudge' emails about the Thin Lizzy version of this, which is a book and a CD (or two?). It looks (on Amazon) to be in much the same style as the 'Motorhead Videobiography' DVD packaging, but this audio jobby is set for release on October 15th, 2007; and the price seems to vary, so if indeed you want a copy, try several suppliers (Play and/or HMV) as well. Seems to be like a carpet-bombing release, as The Beatles and Deep Purple, (and probably many others?), also have similar releases set for around the same time.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Motorblog Dem Ole Washing Machine Blues: And so something of a curse followed the new washing machine, each time it spun, the water backed-up through the waste pipe and bubbled over the kitchen floor. This wasn't a major disaster, floorboards can be handy at times... Cut off the outlet to the drain elbow outside the kitchen, and yes, the 'bend' had become clogged with unused soap powder, (funny how it was OK with the previous 'old-faithful' washing machine?), and this was causing the water to foul on its journey - probably, the new machine shoots it out faster?
A quick ride to the local B & Q DIY warehouse for a couple of new elbows, a length of pipe and some glue, (they keep this locked away now due to adolescent glue-sniffers, [so what about mature glue-sniffers?] so you have to ask for it when you pay); arrived home, glued on the new and everything's OK.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

Motorblog An MHB Interview: Got together on the ether waves with MHB Jimmy McCarthy for a quick Motorhead-orientated interview, which was good fun, Marmite and tea.

Friday, August 10, 2007

Motorblog Currying No Favour: So the washing machine started going tits and finally died on Wednesday. Our third Zanussi, this is what they do after 8 to 10 years, so there's no need for extended warranty; they work like a horse, then die.
Jane went to Curry's, found one she liked with £50 off.
Late yesterday afternoon we went to buy it, the washing mounts up, (I avoided the word 'piles' there, you noticed), and when it's gone, you need another one pretty quickly.
Plump girl smiles and says 'Good afternoon' as we walk in.
Jane shows me the machine, it's a white box with a perspex door and some dials and buttons, looks good enough to me. Jane calls the plump girl. 'I'll get a salesman' she smiled with a little wave.
Sales BOY more like, arrives; all gangly and awkward, but let's not be too personal or ageist.
'We'd like one of those,' Jane says.
'I'll check the computer,' he replies, then scuttles away, only to return to say, 'Yes, we have one in stock, you can take it away now.'
Jane and I exchange blank / amazed expressions.
'Look, we are talking about a washing machine, are we, not a box of Corn Flakes? Like I had a heart op eight months ago and,' nodding at Jane, 'she's female, we'd have a hard job if we were both muscle-bound blokes getting it in an Escort saloon, don't you deliver?'
Sales BOY pulls one of those faces rather like a mechanic when your MOT is going to run into several hundred quid. 'Mmm. Well, the van comes down from Southampton every Wednesday, so it'll be next Thursday...perhaps?'
'But don't you have three or four vans waiting out the back?' I asked, (we / I had attracted some attention by now, a husband and wife with a small child), 'this is the 21st Century, the age of everything happening F>A>S>T>; you're talking as if it was twenty-five years ago...'
Sales BOY shruggs his shoulders. 'Best I can do.'
'Well, you can stick it,' I told him, 'you're obviously not hungry enough for my money, so we'll find someone who is!'
A short drive away we see Comet.
Inside they have 5 or 6 different Zanussi models, Jane finds one she likes better (than skanky-old-Curry's one) for the same price.
She calls a sales MAN, and indeed he is exactly that, a real MAN amongst MEN; a MAN who obviously has hair around his scrotum and sphincter of perhaps not even twig, but possibly branch-like proportions, and obviously knows a pissed-off customer when he sees one.
'I'd like one like this, please,' Jane says, 'when can you deliver?'
'Follow me to the computer and I'll tell you,' he smiles.
As we walk, I give him a precis of the Curry's fiasco.
He smiles. 'And their on commission, we're not, he should have bitten your hand off!'
At the computer, he asks for it, so Jane gives him our postcode and he enters the information.
'Delivery Saturday,' he smiled, '£7-50 extra and we'll take the old machine away.'
This MAN is talking the right language.
It's £18-95 delivery, which was OK, (he didn't even suggest we take the thing away in the car, but he probably knew he'd be headbutted if he had), and we paid the bill. I shook his hand and thanked him by saying 'Curry's is a word no longer in our vocabulary.'
Outside, walking somewhat meekly toward us is the couple with the young child, obviously wary of this ranting loony from that other shop!
I smiled. 'Do you know what, we've been in Comet about four minutes, and I have the machine being delivered on Saturday, that other shop was crap!'
They smiled and nodded oddly, as if to humour me.
'I'm pleased you didn't buy one at that other shop, either,' I called after them, as they hurried toward the safety of people and things to hide behind inside Comet, 'they don't deserve to be in business!'
And we, at least, will never enter their doors again!

Wednesday, August 08, 2007

Motorblog Albert Kuvezin and Yat Kha - 'Re-Covers': Our Russian MHB, Artyom Golew, wised me up to this CD by these two artistes. It's quite an amazing album, in the World Music category, apparently, and very different. Amongst other popular songs, they cover, in a very unique and radical way, Motorhead's 'Orgasmatron;' click this Link and take a listen The album is available through under a Search for Albert Kuvezin.

Also, Congratulations to Norwegian MHB, MotorKent, and his Lady, who became parents for the second time yesterday, to Mia.

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Motorblog Winning Back Life by Minutes: So we reached the end of the avilable series of 'Lost' on DVD and have to wait until October for the next box set.
No problem there.
So we start watching Kiefer Sutherland in '24' which is a massive box set series taking place in 'real time.' This means exactly what it says, and even the three stops for the commercial break, or 'the fucking adverts' as I call them, are timed. And it is this, much like 'Lost,' which makes watching these things on DVD vs the TV broadcast, so alarming.
Both 'Lost' and '24' actually have an episode running time of between 39 and 41 minutes, subjecting us, (well, me, as it doesn't seem to bother anyone else), to twenty minutes of fucking adverts per viewing hour!
Twenty fucking minutes!!!
Now, is it my blood pressure tablets and lack of alcohol and nicotine doing my head in, but the adverts really wind me up. But not because they're adverts, because they are repeated with mind-numbing frequency! Every commercial break we get the same ones, (largely, insurance and loans; [Tess with her 'Picture' loan is the butt of the jokes where my wife works! "Josh, your father's just found your scooter!"] or abused children and pets), time and time again, grinding us down into gibbering idiots. (Much like the playlist on commercial radio when you're sitting in a factory for 8 hours). And yes, the volume IS higher during the TV adverts, (as someone wrote in complaining concurred, but this was denied by the Broadcasting Body), to ensure we hear them whilst we're making a pot / cup of tea in the kitchen!
Anyway, I'm pleased we have the box sets to watch with these series, as I'm winning back the 20 minutes of my life per hour I'd be wasting sitting through the fucking adverts, which, incidentally, I use the 'mute' button on if I do have to suffer them.
And, have you noticed, the hero in most of these thriller series and movies in general, are either named John or Jack?
Think about it, I'm not wrong...

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Motorblog Better Motorhead Vinyl Box Set Out!: After my detailing the 4 LP Box Set yesterday, French MHB, Henri Clausel emailed to tell me it's already out and he bought a copy recently in Paris; so if you'd like one...

Friday, August 03, 2007

Motorblog Better Motorhead Than Dead: Is being released by SPV on September 3rd as a 4 LP (vinyl) box set. My good MHB buddy, Kent from Norway, has found this site to pre-order a copy It may well also be available through the Amazons in due course, but be aware not many copies, (usually around 1,000 only), are pressed, so if you would like one, be quick.
There is also a listing of other Motorhead vinyl available from the same site, click the above Link and check the page.
Motorblog The Lytchett Minster & Upton Smoking Club: After reading August's edition of 'The Clarion,' our village, (well, they say we are now a town, but I'm not sure if this is decided via head count or number of dwellings?), magazine, there was something about The Lytchett Minster & Upton Wine Club meeting sampling some kind of wonderful blanc called 'Chateau Overkill' or whatever, and new members would be welcome to come along to join them.
Well, had my days of smoking still been active, I might have considered, in answer to this, starting a Lytchett Minster & Upton Smoking Club where, one month we would try Woodbines, another month Marlboro, and so on.
I find the song-and-dance people make about drinking wine and having their hoity-toity friends around to 'Try a glass' for an evening almost vomit-worthy, and now the smoking ban is in play, it would be great to get some of my salt-of-the-earth friends around to stick our fingers up at them to have a frightfully jolly good smoke.
Too late.